In memoriam: Jennifer Forster 1947-2009

It is a year tomorrow that my mother died. Our mam was strong, hard working, decent, energetic little woman. My brother and I never did without, thanks to the many sacrifices made by her and my father. She loved having fun and dancing and was very outgoing. We were fortunate to have such a good mother.

When younger my mam had something of a fiery temper - I often clashed with her, we were very similar so I guess this was inevitable, but when she was told in her early 40s that she had Multiple Sclerosis, the fire subsided. The disease took many years to claim her life, and it amazed all of us, her doctor included, that she could still keep going, still be so cheerful when the illness had took away her mobility, her speech, her independence, everything. The more the illness progressed the more her compassion for others grew. But she was also very fortunate to be blessed with such a sunny disposition.

Something my father said about her was true - "Son, your mother is no trouble, she's easy pleased" It seems the easiest way to be happy is to be happy with things as they are, and this is very much how she lived. It was easy to make her smile and laugh, right up to the end, but if we spent too much time reminiscing she would stop me, smile warmly and say "yes pet, but that was then, and this is now." In the 20 years it took for MS to end my mothers life, I never heard her complain once, about anything. When I would see her, her first questions would be about my welfare, that of the rest of the family and that of my friends. She was quite free from anger and ill will. How many of us can claim the same?

My mothers stoicism greatly affected those of us who spent time with her - my brother, myself and the many carers who allowed her to stay in her own home when my father passed away. We have all been truly fortunate to have known her. I miss her a great deal.

Jennifer Carol Forster died October 24 2009. She was 61